GRAB SOME POPCORN, RELAX, AND ENJOY THE SHOW!

Saturday, March 28, 2009

FLAMING SPADE

And the winners are:
Humphrey Bogart (33%) as Sam Spade
Sharon Stone (33%) as Ilsa
Thank you for voting!

FADE IN:

INT. PRIVATE DETECTIVE'S OFFICE - NIGHT

Disheveled piles of papers dominate the DETECTIVE'S dimly lit office. When a WOMAN appears at the door,

DETECTIVE (VO)
Of all the detective agencies in every town,
in all the world, she walks into mine.

Without exchanging a word, she sits opposite SAM SPADE.

SPADE
Cigarette?

WOMAN
Sure.

After lighting her cigarette, he sits on the edge of the desk facing her.

SPADE
You're looking good, Ilsa.

Inhaling the compliment with her cigarette, she smirks.

ILSA
When I was referred to you, I had no idea
it would be -- you.

SPADE
Who'd you expect?

ILSA
The sensitive young man I wanted to marry.

As Spade returns to his chair,

ILSA
You've got quite the reputation.

SPADE
What's that?

ILSA
A hard, no-nonsense detective. Exactly
what I need now.

SPADE
Yeah? Why?

ILSA
I've been accused of embezzling thousands
of dollars from my husband.

SPADE
Did you?

As she abruptly rises,

ILSA
(defiantly)
I'm innocent!

SPADE
I believed you once and I got a year in the
county jail. Why should I believe you now?

WOMAN
Because...

Spade notices the end of a revolver as the door slowly opens. He rushes to Ilsa, pulling her to the floor as a SHOT shatters the window.

SPADE
Before I call the cops, tell me what's going on.

ILSA
I don't know.

As he dials,

SPADE
Your lover?

ILSA
(reluctantly)
My...brother.

SPADE
Here's looking at you kid--in jail.

ILSA
Why, Sam? Why?

SPADE
You broke my heart, baby.

ILSA
I didn't ask you to steal that diamond
necklace.

SPADE
I would have stolen the county treasury
for you, and you knew it.

ILSA
But I never wanted that, Sam. Never!

SPADE
No. You wanted my heart.

ILSA
And you never gave it to me.

Spade stares at her long and hard over the rim of his glass of gin. The phone RINGS, startling him, causing him to spill the drink on himself.

Suddenly, sparks fly from Spade's hands, his face, then all parts of his body. Ilsa recoils at the sight and flees as the sparks ignite the papers. In the flames,

SPADE
We'll always have Paris. We'll always
have Paris. Here's looking at you, kid.
Here's looking at you, kid. I'm HAL of
the 9000 computer series.
(in slo mo)
Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do...

FADE TO BLACK

**written by petra michelle**

http://petramichelle.blogspot.com/


Saturday, March 21, 2009

JACK AND JILL

And the winners are:
Jack - Johnny Depp (38%)
Jill - Kate Hudson (25%)
Thank you for voting!

FADE IN:

EXT. FOOT OF HILL - DAY

JACK and JILL climbed up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown...
Lying on the grass, distorted images of trees beneath the sky come into view as Jack slowly opens his eyes.

JILL
Jack, can you hear me?

Gingerly touching his bruised head, Jack sits up.

JACK
What happened?

JILL
You broke your crown again.

JACK
My crown? I do not wear a crown.

Studying his clothing, then feeling his face,

JACK
Where's my mask? And my cape?

JILL
Mask? Cape? That was some fall, Jack.

JACK
Have we had the pleasure of meeting, Senorita?

JILL
Well, we've only climbed that hill fetching water
together for what seems like an eternity.

JACK
Fetch water? Me?

JILL
Jack...

JACK
And why do you insist on calling me Jack? I am
Don Juan deMarco.

JILL
Who?

As he stands upright,

JACK
The greatest lover in the world.

JILL
(rolling her eyes)
If we don't fetch the water, we'll be sacked. Not
now, of all times.

JACK
My dear Senorita. You must not fret.

JILL
It takes more than love to pay the bills.

JACK
So young and so cynical. Do not underestimate
the power of love. And, it just so happens--I am rich.

JILL
And where, prey tell, is the money?

JACK
On the other side of the hill.

JILL
Fine. Let's go.

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill to fetch deMarco's money. Jack fell down and broke his crown... Moaning, Jack lies in a stupor.

JILL
Jack?
(no answer)
Mr. deMarco?

JACK
Who?

JILL
James Bond.

JACK
No.

JILL
Robin Hood.

JACK
No.

Jill guides him over the hill by the hand. As they disappear,

JILL (OS)
The King of England.

JACK (OS)
Yes. Yes. Yes.

FADE TO BLACK

**written by petra michelle**

http://petramichelle.blogspot.com/

Saturday, March 14, 2009

ST. PATRICK

And the winners are:
St. Patrick - Peter O'Toole (60%)
Milchu - Malcolm McDowell (42%)
St. Germain - Sean Connery (57%)
Thank you for voting!

FADE IN:

INT. KILPATRICK ESTATE. early 5th century SCOTLAND - NIGHT

IRISH MARAUDERS wreak havoc on the Kilpatrick Estate, abducting young Patrick.

ST. PATRICK (VOICEOVER)
I was sixteen when taken prisoner and brought
to Ireland. There, I was sold as a slave to a
chieftan named Milchu.

EXT. IRISH COUNTRYSIDE - DAY

While tending the flocks in the valley of the Braid and on the slopes of Slemish,

ST. PATRICK (VO)
For six years, I was held captive. In those
days I have said as many as a hundred prayers
and in the night, nearly the same; so that
whilst in the woods and on the mountain, even
before dawn, I was roused to prayer.

The six years of Patrick's captivity became preparation for his future apostolate.

ST. PATRICK (VO)
In a dream, God admonished that I flee. I
found a ship ready to set sail. After some
rebuffs, I was allowed onboard. Though I
returned to Britain among friends, my heart
was set on devoting myself to God.

EXT. BRITISH PROVINCES - DAY

It was under ST. GERMAIN'S guidance, Patrick would be promoted to the priesthood a few years later and became engaged in missionary work.

ST. PATRICK (VO)
Commissioned by the Holy See, St. Germain
proceeded to Britain to combat the erroneous
teachings of Pelagius. I was chosen to be one
of his missionaries and priveleged to have
witnessed much, including the calming of the
tempest at sea.

However, Patrick's thoughts turned towards Ireland, and from time to time he was favored with visions of the children from Focluth who cried to him, "O holy youth, come back to Erin, and walk once more amongst us."

ST. PATRICK (VO)
With the blessing of Celestine, Pope of Rome,
who bestowed me with the name Patercius,
St. Germain and I set out for Ireland.

EXT. TARA. 433 IRELAND - EASTER SUNDAY

On Easter Sunday, DRUID CHIEFS and BREHONS came in full numbers to assemble at Tara in 433.

DRUIDS
O king, live forever. This fire, which has been
lighted in defiance of the royal edict, will blaze
forever in this land unless it be this very night
extinguished.

By order of the king and the agency of druids, repeated attempts were made to extinguish the blessed fire and to punish with death the intruder who had disobeyed the royal command. But the fire was not extinguished and, Patrick, shielded by the Divine power.

ST. PATRICK (VO)
The druids and magicians put forth all their
strength and employed all their incantations
to maintain their sway over the Irish race.
But our prayer and faith achieved a glorious
triumph.
(beat)
By their incantations, a cloud of darkness
spread over the hill and surrounding plain.
I defied them to remove the cloud and knelt
in prayer. The sun sent forth its rays and
the brightest sunshine lit up the hills.

It was indeed a momentous day for the Irish race. Although the king had given orders that no sign of respect was to be extended, Erc, a royal page, arose to show Patrick reverence; and at that second, when all the chieftans were assembled, the chief-bard, Dubhtach, showed Patrick the same honor.

ST. PATRICK (VO)
I then plucked a shamrock from the sward
to explain by its triple leaf and single stem
the Blessed Trinity. And on that bright
Easter Day, the triumph of religion at Tara
was complete.

FADE TO BLACK

It is sometimes supposed that St. Patrick's apostolate in Ireland was an unbroken series of peaceful triumphs, but is quite the reverse. He was subjected to frequent trials at the hands of the druids and other enemies. No fewer than 12 times he and his companions were seized and carried off as captives, and on one occasion, his death was decreed, but was liberated by benign Providence.

St. Patrick continued until his death to visit and watch over the churches he had founded in all provinces in Ireland. He comforted the faithful in their difficulties, strengthened their faith and virtue, and appointed pastors to continue his work among them.

At Saul, St. Patrick received the summons to his reward on March 17, 493 and St. Tassach administered the last sacraments to him. His remains were wrapped in the shroud woven by St. Brigid and were interred at the chieftan's Fort two miles from Saul, where the Cathedral of Down would arise.

Information from the Catholic Encyclopedia on St. Patrick at http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/11554a.htm .

**formatted by petra michelle**

http://petramichelle.blogspot.com/

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Rerun of WAYWORN HOME

And the winners are:
Jake - Tie between:
Heath Ledger (37%)
Jude Law (37%)
Margaret - Sally Field (50%)
Thank you for voting!

FADE IN:

EXT. LOG CABIN. MID-1800's - DAY

A young COWBOY rides up to a modest log cabin set on a farm. As he climbs down off his horse, geese snap and chickens CACKLE. A WOMAN his mother's age, opens the door, observing him through a shotgun.

MARGARET
What can I do for you?

JAKE
Well, ma'am. I was wondering if you could use
any help around the farm. Mrs. Johnson sent me.

Margaret studies his thin frame and handsome, but pale face.

JAKE
I notice the roof needs mending.

MARGARET
Have you had anything to eat today?

JAKE
No, ma'am. Not yet.

She gestures he enter the cabin.

INT. KITCHEN. CABIN - DAY

Coffee permeates the kitchen and biscuits sit on the center of the table. Jake quickly glances at the cabin's humble surroundings, then stares at a photo.

MARGARET
Sit down.

JAKE
Thank you.

Awkward silences are exchanged between them as Margaret sets a plate of fried chicken, biscuits, and a cup of coffee before him.

Margaret
What's your name, son?

JAKE
Jake Hadden.

Margaret's eyes widen as she stumbles. Jake quickly assists her to a chair.

JAKE
Are your all right, maw?

She gazes at him, questioning how he knew she was his mother, then notices a pendant around his neck.

MARGARET
Paw gave you that pendant, didn't he?

JAKE
Right before he died.

MARGARET
Died?

She turns to hide her tears.

MARGARET
I gave it to him years ago when...

As she sobs, Jake reaches for her hand.

JAKE
Don't cry, maw.

MARGARET
I should never have left you behind, son.
Can you forgive me?

He hugs her reassuringly.

JAKE
I know it wasn't easy.

As they embrace,

JAKE
I love you, maw.

FADE TO BLACK

**written by petra michelle**

http://petramichelle.blogspot.com/

Monday, March 2, 2009

FIDDLE-DEE-DEE

And the winners are:
Scarlett - Angelina Jolie (30%)
Mammy - Queen Latifah (36%)
Julie - Reese Witherspoon (40%)
Ashley - Tie between:
Leslie Howard (30%)
Ashton Kutcher (30%)
Rhett - Tie between:
Rhett Butler (30%)
Josh Brolin (30%)
Thank you for voting!

FADE IN:

INT. MANSION. POST-CIVIL WAR ATLANTA, GEORGIA - DAY

SCARLETT escorts her new SUITOR to the front door of her mansion.

SUITOR
Don't leave me on tender hooks, Scarlett.

SCARLETT
Fiddle-dee-dee! I'll give you my answer tomorrow.

As MAMMY appears,

SCARLETT
Good day, Mr. Finnegan.

Upon Mr. Finnegan's departure,

MAMMY
Julie Marsden is waiting in the drawing room.

SCARLETT
Thank you, Mammy. Oh, bring in tea and biscuits.


INT. DRAWING ROOM - SAME

JULIE is fondly studying Ashley Wilkes' photo. When Scarlett appears, she sets it back in its rightful place.

SCARLETT
(extending her hand)
It's a pleasure meeting you, Miss Marsden.

MISS MARSDEN
Please. Call me, Julie.

SCARLETT
Are you planning to build a home here in Atlanta, Julie?
I'm not ashamed to say I have the finest Georgia pine.

Mammy enters and sets the tray of tea and biscuits down.

JULIE
Frankly, I've come for your advice.

SCARLETT
Advice?

JULIE
What's your secret?

SCARLETT
(perplexed)
Secret?

JULIE
You've been married three times.
(on verge of tears)
Seems, I'll be an old maid.

SCARLETT
Fiddle-dee-dee, Julie.

JULIE
Fiddle-dee-dee? That's the secret?

Before Scarlett replies, ASHLEY WILKES stumbles in.

ASHLEY
There you are, Scarlett. I rushed over to tell you...

He stops abruptly at the sight of Julie.

ASHLEY
Hello.

JULIE
(sensually)
Fiddle-dee-dee.

As she pours herself a cup of tea,

ASHLEY
Let me help you.

Scarlett watches on, aghast.

SCARLETT
(in rapid exchange)
Fiddle-dee-dee.

On cue, Ashley stops pouring to tend to Scarlett.

JULIE
(competetively)
Fiddle-dee-dee, Ashley.

He turns to Julie, smiling.

RHETT BUTLER barges in past Mammy.

RHETT
Scarlett, it's just no good. I can't go on without you.

SCARLETT
Rhett!

As Ashley pats Julie's hand,

SCARLETT
Ashley!

RHETT
Once and for all, Scarlett, make up your mind!

SCARLETT
And spoil the fun?

RHETT
(frustrated, turns to Mammy)
Fiddle-dee-dee, Mammy!

MAMMY
(blushing)
Lordy, Mr. Rhett. You is bad!

FADE TO BLACK

HOW MANY REFERENCES TO "GONE WITH THE WIND" HAVE YOU FOUND?
Ten or less? Ten or more?

**written by petra michelle**

http://petramichelle.blogspot.com/