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Friday, August 1, 2008

Afraid of Clark Gable?

And the winners are:
Belle: It's a tie between Joan Cusack and Reese Witherspoon (30% each)
Eddie: Bill Murray (41%)
Thank you for voting!

FADE IN:

INT. STAGE. CARNEGIE HALL - NIGHT

APPLAUSE accompanies a famous MAGICIAN after finishing his Disappeariang Act. He turns to the audience and bows.

MAGICIAN
Thank you. Now, for my next act, I will need two volunteers.

A scattering of people in the audience rise. A COUPLE wearing baseball caps in the second row LAUGH in excitement. The magician points to them; gestures they join him onstage. When they arrive,

MAGICIAN
And what is your name, sir?

MAN
Eddie.

MAGICIAN
Very nice to meet you, Eddie. And is this your lovely wife?

EDDIE
My soon to be wife, Belle.

MAGICIAN
And a belle you are.

Belle grins bashfully; hands clasped nervously below her waist.

MAGICIAN
Now, this act is about our fears. Most of us have some type of phobia. A fear of heights, for example, or of snakes.

He turns to Eddie.

MAGICIAN
Hold out your cap, would you please, Eddie? And close your eyes. Now, think of something you're afraid of.

Eddie closes his eyes.

MAGICIAN
(gently prodding)
Think...think.

Out of Eddie's hat crawls a tarantula.

MAGICIAN
Slowly open your eyes, Eddie.

Eddie GASPS at the sight of the spider he's deathly afraid of, immediately dropping his cap to the stage floor. The audience APPLAUDS wholeheartedly while the magician's assistant appears to pick up the cap, then leaves.

MAGICIAN
Are you ready, Belle?

She squirms as she nods.

MAGICIAN
All right then. Take off your cap, close your eyes, and think of what scares you most.

Belle closes her eyes, squeezing them tightly. The audience begins to LAUGH. Eddie retreats. The magician looks puzzled. Belle beams from ear to ear.

MAGICIAN
You're afraid of Clark Gable?

BELLE
Not at all. I'm just terrified of marrying Eddie.
(turns to Clark)
Ready, Mr. Gable?

Arm in arm, they walk off the stage together; Eddie scratching his head.

FADE TO BLACK

*written by petra michelle*

http://petramichelle.blogspot.com/
http://ifreelance.com/pro/43547

6 comments:

Tipper said...

Hilarious! I'll be smiling about this one all day.

Rowena said...

roflmao!!!! Great one Petra!

Jules said...

LOVE it!
Nice job Petra.
Can I play Belle?

i beati said...

Judy all right - Josh Hartnett and Amanda Pete or Jessica Garner and hubby ???

Joyce Ellen Davis said...

And the Magician?

Joyce Ellen Davis said...

Maybe Pearce Brosnan. And when the act is over, he can sing and tap dance his way off stage right, using his magic wand as a cane.... (a little something from Mama Mia, perhaps).